The BIG List of Quotes:
Overheard in the Shadows

Logan Graves (Fenris@BigKnobiKlub.virtualAve.net)

With my wholehearted appologies to Leading Edge Games, here's a HUGE batch of quotes that I simply couldn't pass up, which are found in the margins of their sourcebooks. I've slightly modified them to fit into the Shadowrun Universe. For a pristene (ie. un-fragged-with) quote listing, check out L E G Quotes -- it's well worth the trip as are their gaming products.
Fenris (23:55:51/5-12-57)

"Axly Suregrip-isms"	"Gil the Tretcherous-isms"
Just What the Street Doc Ordered	Knight-Errant Security Services
Ares Macrotech: We're #1	XHaDO Rocks!
Famous Last Words	Saeder-Krupp's Dragoons
Merc Mirth	Starving & Lost in the Salish Lands
Desert War is Heck!	Urbane Brawl - NOT!

The Mis-Adventures of Axly Suregrip

• "Yes, I was aiming at him, but I've never hit anything with a rocket launcher before, so I didn't think it mattered."
  
• "Well...Don't look at me! I'm not the only one who breaks things around here."
  
• "Let me be the judge of that."
  
• "This is more fun than looking for the illusion in the china shop!"
  
• "How was I supposed to know he was an unarmed man? His back was to me."
  
• "I'm too busy worrying about what I've done to think about what I'm doing."
  
• "Don't look at me. He wasn't squished like a bug the last time I saw him"
  
• "It was an accident. No, really, this time it was. Let me explain...."
  
• "Captain, the Sea Cucumber has capsized...but the fire's out."
  
• "It's OK to abandon your principles, if you're doing right."
  
• "Everything here has been blown up, burned down, or broken; my work is done."
  
• "If I wasn't here to break things, when would you practice your repair skills?"
  
• "If you have enough ammo, it doesn't matter how badly you aim."
  
• "I can either stay in and be annoying or go out and be stupid. The choice is yours."
  Axly Suregrip

"These war dogs just aren't working out. I can't even teach them to sit. And just forget about teaching them to parry."
Animal Trainer Axly

"I Quit."
Ex-Sheriff Axly, His Farewell Address (given a few minutes before the MacMyer Gang rode back into town)

"Relax. This city has been here for a hundred years. How much damage can a few 'runners do in only eight hours? Here, have another donut."
Officer Axly, Lone Star Security Services

Blam. Blam. "Stop." Blam. "Police." Blam.
Officer Axly
      "Oops."
      Ex-Officer Axly

"Why isn't Russian Roulette an acceptable way to rally a broken man?"
Lieutenant Axly

• "In an emergency, it's women, children, and ranking officers first. Not necessarily in that order."
• "Sometimes I question the wisdom of my actions, but more often I seem to be acknowledging the stupidity of them."
• "In retrospect, that was a terrible decision. Fortunately, everyone else who knows that is dead now."
  Captain Axly

"Oops! Adjustment fire, 1000 meters left... No, no, the other left!"
Axly, Forward Observer for a Day

"What do you mean our VP might be a little dead?"
Axly Suregrip, Bodyguard for a Day

"If this fire spreads any further, I'll have to get more marshmallows."
Soon-to-be-ex-firefighter Axly

"Well, I can't find the jumper cables. We'll have to push start it."
Tank Commader Axly

"If you can see it, shoot it. You can always Identify it once it's dead."
The Axly Suregrip Philosophy

Blam. Blam. "Stop thrashing, Osgood, give me a clean shot!"
Blam. Blam. "That's better."
Blam. Blam. Blam.... "Oops."
Axly Suregrip

"Well, I knew it was wrong, but I didn't think it mattered."
"OK, I knew it mattered, but I didn't think anyone would notice."
"Even if they noticed, I didn't think they would know it was me."
Axly

"Well, yes, I did it...but it's not my fault."
"Alright, it is my fault...but I'm not responsible."
"Well, maybe I am responsible...but I'm not to blame."
"Yes. I am to blame...but they made me do it."
Axly

"Just because it's my gun doesn't mean I'm the one who fired it."
"OK, I fired it, but I didn't think I'd hit any civilians."
"Well, yes, it did occur to me that I might hit one or two civilians. But I never really thought I would hit all of them."
Axly

"I didn't want to shoot him."
"Well...maybe I did want to shoot him, but I didn't mean to kill him."
"OK. Maybe I did mean to kill him...but he deserved it."
Axly

"But if I had hesitated, I could be the dead one now."
"Well I could be the dead one if he had been aiming at me..."
"...and if he'd had a gun..."
"...and if he had been the enemy."
Axly

"Axly says the building has two sub-basements and wants a C-SWAT team with ropes standing by."
Corwin

"Can we get some Artificial Intelligence for Axly? It would be an improvement."
Damien

"While docking with the Zuchi-Orbital, Axly punched a hole through the airlock and stuck his lieutenant over it. We left him there, struck to the wall by the vacuum pressure, cursing and kicking."
Haft

"Get a squad ready! Axly slipped his leash!"
Ipaarb

"Is Axly tough? Yes. Talented? Yes. Brave? Oh, certainly. He is also erratic, irresponsible, accident-prone, and a constant threat to public safety. The trick is to keep him pointed in the right direction."
Niki

"Oh, your helmet...Well, while you were unconscious, Axly used you as a rolling battering ram."
Palin

"I don't understand, Axly. No one else runs out of ammunition on their Laser Cannons."
Sandy Jorden

"This device has survived two weeks in Axly's hands. I think that qualifies it for anything."
Sandy Jorden, Senior Technician

"Don't ask me to fix his helmet. It's his head that needs fixing."
Sandy Jorden, Senior Technician, about Axly Suregrip

"Look, Axly, if you break that Laser Comm, you had better have a good set of lungs."
Val

"I see smoke...where's Axly?"
"I see flames...where's Axly?"
"I hear screams...where's Axly?"
Vladimir

"...and grenades are also useful for digging foxholes, removing unwanted shrubbery,
unclogging drains..."
Axly's book of "Explosives for Pyromaniacs"

• 1001 Popular Rallying Cries
  
• Buttering Up Your Superiors and Other Winning Strategies
  
• How to Avoid Going into Battle Without Looking Like a Coward
  
• How to Blame Others For Your Mistakes
  
• How to Get Medals That Should Have Gone to Dead Guys
  
• How to Get Promotions that Others Deserve
  
• How to Give Speeches Without Really Saying Anything
  
• How to Lead When You Don't Know What You're Doing
  
• How to Lead Without Getting Shot
  Available Titles in the Lone Star Combat Command Series of Officer Training Manuals by Axly Suregrip.

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Gil the Tretcherous

• "I tried to disable him. You know, a short chop to his forearm and he's out of the fight? But his neck got in the way."
  
• "Run Away!"
  
• "Trust me, it works every time. Just let the Egadsu grab you and the rest of us will attack while it's busy."
  
• "I'll hold my ground as long as they're in front of you, and you're in front of me."
  
• "It is always best to start running away early, before the rush. That way there are fewer bodies to trip over."
  
• "There is no such thing as excessive violence."
  
• "You go left, you go right, you go up the middle, you over there, and I'll stay here."
  
• "It won't do you any good to hide behind the girl. She'll only stop 3 points."
  
• "You're not through, until he's blue."
  
• "Don't think of it as Murder. Think of it as Involuntary Euthanasia."
  
• "Of course I'm having a good time. I'm winning."
  
• "Why recover the bodies. Someone is just going to have to bury them again anyway."
  
• "Why recover the body? I cleaned him out in the poker game last night."
  
• "As far as I'm concerned, anyone slower than me is the rearguard."
  
• "We could at least have a cease-fire long enough to loot the dead and wounded."
  
• "Give you one good reason? I'll give you .45 good reasons."
  
• "He turned around at the last moment just to make it look like I stabbed him in the back."
  
• "Any way you look at it, we win. If we beat them, we get all the food. If we lose, it's just that many fewer mouths to feed."
  
• "Shoot first and ask questions later. You get better answers."
  
• "Some people are meant to give orders, and some people are meant to take them. Others we just have to shoot in the head. Nothing personal."
  
• "One of these bullets has your name on it, and I'm going to keep firing until I find it."
  
• "I know what to do. Let's send one of the disposable characters."
  Gil the Treacherous

"My loyal troop...you've come back to save me!"
Captain Stora
      "Actually, sir, we came back for your gun...."
      Gil the Treacherous

"I said interrogate the prisoner, Gil. Not ventilate."
Derek

"I don't think he is going to talk. We'll have to kill him.
Gil the Treacherous
      "Maybe you should remove the gag first, Gil."
      Derek

"Just because we're supposed to look like Azzies doesn't mean we have to act like them."
Esteban Teller
      "I'm just getting into character."
      Gil the Treacherous

"Gil, you're going to pay your debt in bullets...our bullets."
Some ex-friends of Gil the Treacherous

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Just What the Street Doc Ordered

"Geeze, and I thought Doc Dicer had an attitude..."
Fenris

---

"Now let me get this straight-you parried one blow with your shield, one with your sword,
and the other with your head?"
Dr. Buen-Scheuk to a patient

"And now, students, I will demonstrate my new breakthrough in anaesthesia. Nurse, hand me my garrote."
Professor Oscar Schneiderbunk, M.D.

• "Well, I realize it must be uncomfortable, but think how much worse it would be if the round had detonated."
  
• "Don't think of it as dying. Of course, that's what it is, but try not to think about it."
  
• "If you want compassion, there is an extra charge."
  
• "If you listen to your body, you will find that it's not pain, it's only extreme discomfort."
  
• "It's never a good idea to increase your surface area to volume ratio."
  
• "Just another tragic case of terminal kinetic energy poisoning."
  
• "Would you like to donate the blood you have left? It doesn't seem to be doing you any good."
  
• "It's good that you lost your sight. Otherwise you'd see how awful your other injuries are."
  
• "Two out of three is bad."
  Dr. Buen-Scheuk, Street Doc

"Why did you beep me? This man is dead. Even I can't help him now."
Dr. Oscar Schneiderbunk, arriving late for surgery

"Between the Ares HVAR and the Man-Pac Rocket Launcher our jobs have gotten much easier. You just take this tag and tie it to the toe."
Meadis Nerion, Aztechnology Meditec, 2057

• "All my work is guaranteed for life, or you get your money back."
  
• "Don't think of it as losing a leg. Think of it as eliminating the risk of tripping over your own two feet."
  
• "Don't worry, this won't hurt any worse than it did when the bomb exploded."
  
• "Don't worry, this won't hurt any worse than it did when you first got shot."
  
• "Don't worry, this won't hurt any worse than it did when you first got stomped."
  
• "First, let's separate the cases into those who have insurance, and those who don't."
  
• "Hand me my blowtorch. I must sterilize the wound."
  
• "Hand me my crowbar. I must pry out the bullet."
  
• "Hand me my grenade. Pre-Op is getting crowded."
  
• "Hand me my mallet, I must anesthetize him."
  
• "Hand me my mallet. I must tenderize the area before making the first incision."
  
• "Hand me my mallet. The swelling will stop the bleeding."
  
• "Hand me my melon baller. This man is full of shrapnel."
  
• "Hand me my soldering iron. I am ready to close."
  
• "Hand me my staple gun. This bandage is loose."
  
• "Hand me the drain cleaner; this man's arteries are blocked."
  
• "He died prematurely and tragically. I hadn't been paid yet."
  
• "How can he be dead? I haven't operated on him yet."
  
• "I don't care how you feel. Let's just remember who the doctor is here."
  
• "I must be doing something right. Not everyone here is dead."
  
• "If I were a good physician, do you think I'd be working in this dump?"
  
• "If it didn't hurt, how would you know I was doing my job?"
  
• "In my career, I've learned to live with death. And now, private, so will you. Except for the 'live' part."
  
• "Listen, if you don't stop bleeding, I'll never get back to my dinner."
  
• "Most people would say this man is half dead. But I am a doctor. And I like to think of him as half alive."
  
• "Multiple gunshot wounds. Numerous shell fragments. A deep bayonet wound. Let's call it Natural Causes."
  
• "Nurse, we're out of the 'Condolences to the Next of Kin' stationery. Order another ten gross."
  
• "Oh, stop your whining. You've got another leg."
  
• "One more word out of you and I'll perform another unnecessary surgery."
  
• "Relax. If, by some miracle you survive this procedure, you'll be fine."
  
• "Settle down or I'll sew your earlobes to the bed."
  
• "So he's dead. Is that any reason not to operate on him?"
  
• "Sterilization is higly overrated. I washed my hands before lunch - what more do you want?"
  
• "Tell the patients to stay calm. There are plenty of body bags for everyone."
  
• "The bad news is that you're going to die. The good news is that the pain is going to become so intense that it will knock you out in a couple of hours, so by the time you die your suffering will be over."
  
• "The patient's thoughts are disjointed. But so is his body."
  
• "This operation seems to have become an autopsy."
  
• "Try not to bleed so much in the waiting room. It's uncomfortable for the ones who might survive."
  
• "We need more surgeons. You there, with the two arms, grab a scalpel and get to work."
  
• "Well, I put him back together, but I seem to have a few pieces left over."
  
• "Well, I say you're dead. So settle down and take it like a man."
  
• "What are the chances that I could lose 49 patients in the same day? Let's find out, shall we? Next!"
  
• "What do you expect me to do with him? He's got more holes than a golf course."
  
• "Why would you want a second opinion? Don't you trust me?"
  
• "Yes, you have lost a lot of blood, but with all of the pieces you're missing, you shouldn't need as much."
  
• "You were right, nurse, I did already operate on him. Guess I should close him up again."
  Dr. Oscar Schneiderbunk, Shadowcutter.

"With all of the wood I've taken out of you, I'll be able to build a new rec room."
"Of course, since you've donated most of the material, you can visit anytime."
"Of course, that hinges on the assumption that you pull through."
"You have so many wood fragments in you that I'm not going to remove them. I'll just sand you down."
"In fact, you don't even need surgery. You need to be varnished."
Dr. Ezra Millstone, Street Surgeon

• "I'm not crazy, just furious."
  
• "My cognition is not impaired. Only my inhibitions against violence have been crippled."
  
• "I'm the only psychiatrist on my block with a sub-machinegun."
  Dr. Henry Finston, Daily Log

"Well, he looks dead to me. I don't care if he does have a pulse."
Dr. Oscar Schneiderbunk, Coroner, Aztechnology Pyramid

"If you will just talk to me, I know I can help you.
But if you keep making this difficult, I'll blow your head off."
Dr. Henry Finston, Street Shrink

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Hitttin' the Books at Knight-Errant Security Services

"Maximize Casualties!"
Knight-Errant Battle Cry

"No Survivors!"
Knight-Errant Battle Cry for special occasions

"One for all, and all for one,
if he's out of arms reach, then go for your gun."
The Knight-Errant's Monosword^® Musketeers

• "Kill it before it dies!"
  
• "If you hit them hard enough, they can't complain."
  
• "You must lure the enemy into the open: Drive ten times around the apartment block."
  Excerpts, Knight-Errant Battle Manual

"Well, you can just die then."
Excerpt, Knight-Errant Diplomacy Manual

• "You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time...and that should be enough to get you through."
  
• "You can kill some of the people all of the time, and you can kill all of the people some of the time, but you can't kill all of the people all of the time...because then who'll scrub the bathrooms?"
  Excerpts, Knight-Errant Political Manual

• "Live bodies fall faster than rocks which fall faster than dead bodies."
  
• "We have found after extensive research that living human cannonballs are only marginally effective, and can only be used once."
  
• "Using living humans for terminal guidance has been completely ineffective on all spin-stabilized rounds."
  Excerpts, Knight-Errant Ballistic Research Manual

"Avoid the sharp, pointy end at all costs."
Excerpt, Knight-Errant Survival Manual

"If I shoot you, and you shoot me, who will be left to shoot them?"
Knight-Errant Philosophical Riddle

• "He who shoots first lives longest."
  
• "That which does not kill me merely annoys me."
  
• "That which does not kill me just injures me severely."
  
• "That which does not kill me does not kill me. And I am grateful."
  Traditional Knight-Errant Proverbs

"Many are called, but few survive."
Motto over Knight-Errant Induction Center

"Don't be too worried about a Head hit. For most of you it won't make any difference."
Sgt. Schustec, Knight-Errant Security Services

"Your shots will be more consistently accurate if you keep your eyes open."
Sgt. Schustec, Knight-Errant Drill Instructor

"Congratulations, you are now Knight-Errant! Get weapons and armor from the pile of bodies on your right. The fight is down the corridor to the left."
Sgt. Slaughterer, Battle of the Red Pyramid membership drive

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ARES MACROTECH: We're Number 1!

"Do people really care enough about student demonstrators to put a thin plastic coating over a 13 gram steel core? People do."
Ares Arms, Ad campaign

"The steel core is included in our plastic bullets for the sole purpose of making the round visible on X-Rays. And no one even says thank-you."
Ares Macrotechnology, Press Release

"Pull Trigger. Repeat as Necessary."
Instruction Manual supplied with all weapons from Ares Arms.

"We bring good things to ruins."
Ares Arms motto

"Ares Arms: We're Number One! (Just give us the name and address of anyone who disagrees)."
Ares Slogan

"Better Weapons for a Better Tomorrow."
Ares Arms Corporate Motto

"Guns don't kill people. Bullets kill people."
Ares Arms, Seattle Division Motto

"All's Well that Aims Well."
Ares Arms Quality Assurance Slogan

"How am I shooting? Call '1-800-GOOD-AIM'."
Sticker commonly attached to vehicles used by Ares Marcotech

"All disputes will be settled by Porto-Cannon."
Excerpt, Ares Internal Memo on Corporate Decision Making

"If they liked the Porto-Cannon, just wait until they see my Wheel Barrow gun."
Ares Design Engineer

"Preserve Wildlife. Or it might explode on you."
Cautionary roadsign in areas where Ares Mines are in use.

"Hello, this is your Commander speaking. It looks like we have a little incoming fire ahead. At this time
I would like to ask all passengers to return to their seats, fasten their safety belts, and extinguish all smoking materials. Have a nice fight."
Knight-Errant intercom announcement.

"No, I can't afford Dragon Insurance. I can barely afford Ares Insurance."
Seretech Vice-President, Security

"If found, please drop in any Ares Areospace freight depository. Postage prepaid."
Written on Ares Drop Pods

"Ares Macrotech-Redemption Value"
Sticker added to Ares Drop Pods

• ARES MACROTECHNOLOGY-
  
• Where you want it.
  
• When you want it.
  
• No refund, no return."
  Ares Macrotechnology Ad

"Now that you have decided to fix my ships, can I have my Drop Pods Back?"
Ares Aerospace Exec to the Head of Ares Tech Support

"What you want is our Extra Large Time Release Capsule, which provides continuous coverage for a full 12 hours."
Ares Aero

"Are your spirits getting low? Take Amphicaine, and go - go - go! It's a once in a lifetime experience!"
Failed ad campaign created by Ares Pharmaceuticals

"The Amphicaine Corps-We're just looking for a few expendable men."
Failed ad campaign created by Hard Corps Security Services

• The Few.
• The Proud.
• The Insane.
• The Amphicaine Corps.
  Yet another failed ad campaign created by Hard Corps Security

"High Casualties? Call Hard Corps Temp. Warm Bodies when you need them."
Ares Advertising Division proposal.

"Scouting reports underestimated enemy forces? Call Hard Corps Temp. No foe is too big, no fee is too big."
Ares Advertising

"Offensive opportunity of a lifetime? Call Hard Corps Temp. Expendable troops in a hurry."
Ares Advertising

"The Government says you can't have it. We say you can. We're Ares Arms."
Popular and long-running ad campaign from Ares Arms

"Break the Law with a name you can trust. Smuggle with Ares Arms."
Another popular ad campaign from Ares Arms (not distributed to the general public)

"When I have trouble sleeping, I take Amne-Forte. At least, I think I take it."
Failed Ad campaign for Amne-Forte, Ares Pharmaceuticals

"I've been taking Amne-Forte since, um, well...and it's done wonders for...well, time for a nap."
Humbert No-Dose

"Who these guys? Didn't we just bro' them up?"
Corporate Renraku military official, at the start of the second attack by Ares Macrotech

Blam. Blam. Blam. Blam. Blam. Blam.
"Hey, stop that. That hurts. I mean it."
Hard Corps trooper equipped with Amphicaine

"If we put armor on the back, it will just encourage them to get shot there."
"Besides, If they get shot in the back, they deserve it."
Design Engineer, Ares Macrotech's Templar Power Armor

"We were going to call it 'Cyclops', because he didn't have a redundant system either."
Ares Sales Representative talking about Templar Power Armor

"The Armor sucks, but we all get real big guns."
Hard Corps Templar Soldier

"If You Can Read This, You're Doomed.."
Printed on a Templar Escape Decoy Balloon

"We only came here for the atmosphere."
Captain Rex Hunter, Bane Company, 3rd Battalion (Bearers of Eternal Vengeance), Hard Corps Special Forces, Tir Tairngire: Subcon 111

"Don't you have better things to do than setting Demo Charges around the house?"
In the Ares Nursery (probably Ricochet Rita's)

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XHaDO Rocks!

"Somewhere, deep in the heart of Aztlan, an election is taking place & free state (ie. 'pirate') radio, 'XHDO,' (ie. "SHaDOw") is there to bring you all o' the gory returns..."
Fenris

---

"The Truth shall bind and beat you."
Free State Radio

"Even now, on the eve of Election Day, the campaign battle is undecided. But, inside sources say Generalissimo Puerco's forces have a strong lead, holding 26 of the 31 registered ballot stations."
Free State Radio

"Today is Election Day, and we urge all citizens to vote NO with the weapon of their choice."
XHaDO Radio, "The Voice of Anarchy"

"We are pleased to announce that Generalissimo Puerco, alias Jonathan Sunshine, alias Ronald Unreasonable, alias None of theAbove, has won the election by a unanimous vote."
Free State Radio, "The Voice of Reason"

"In a surprise move to show that he too is making sacrifices, his excellency, El Puerco has blown up his presidential palace."
Free State Radio, "All truth, all the time"

"This is not a coup. Parliament still makes all the decisions. We're just here to make sure they
make the right ones."
Brandy Charlatan, Station Manger, XHaDO Radio

"My friends, I foresee the dawn of a new age. I foresee a time when Aztlan will stand united, and be a shining example for the rest of the world. And, I foresee only the greatest of prosperity in the years ahead."
Excerpt from Manuel Puerto's Acceptance Speech, upon his election to the post of President for Life
      "I foresee you needing some more bodyguards. Soon."
      Commentary by Jonathan Sunshine, during his Election Analysis broadcast.

"The abilities of this Brandy Charlatan, and her entire crew, are vastly overrated. She and her pathetic 'radio station' will be captured within days, and that will put an end to this rebel nonsense."
Excerpts from one of Captain Loath's memos to Generalissimo Manuel Puerco, shortly after XHDO Radio first began broadcasting
      "Loath, you couldn't find your stump with both hands. Sincerely, B. Charlatan & the Gang at XHaDO."
      Note found on Captain Loath's bed, during his hospital stay.

"President-For-Life El Puerco has given his personal assurance that this will be a Kindler and Gentler war."
Free State Radio

"Today's forecast calls for heavy contact along the northern outskirts, strong probes throughout the neutral zone, and scattered artillery barrages throughout the evening."
XHaDO Radio "All nukes, all the time"

"Today's travel report...Small arms fire along Route 6 with bursts of heavy machine gun fire. Blast shields are required below 3000 feet."
XHaDO Radio, "Hot off the firing line"

• "Puerco just talks...XHaDO Rocks!"
  
• "PRESIDENT PUERCO? IN A PIG'S EYE!"
  
• "EL PUERCO IS JUST A HAM"
  Entrants in the Graffiti Contest

• "EL PUERCO IS A SCU-"
  Honorable Mention in 'Closest To Gun' category. While the Entry was incomplete, the judges felt that the death of the author, coupled with the fact that the Entry was painted directly on a gun, warranted official recognition.

• "XHADOW!!YELL IT, DON'T SPELL IT!"
  2nd Place, Best Graffiti on Retaining Wall

"She Scrubbed my face with a Scouring Pad"
The Nightmen, #29 on the XHaDO "Top .44"

"Bonk, Bonk On the Head"
Ghastly Weaponry, #24 on the XHaDO "Top .44"

"Don't It Make My Blue Eyes Black"
OrcBoy and the Ogres, #7 with a bullet on the XHaDO "Top .44"

"Who Knows, Who Cares, Why Bother"
Wolvesblood, #31 on the XHaDO "Top .44"

"If You Love Me, Slam My Head Against the Wall"
Music and Mayhem, #33 on the XHaDO "Top .44"

"Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho, It's to the Games we go, With Razor Blades and Hand Grenades, Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho."
The Seven Scum, #3 on the XHaDO "Top .44"

"I've been getting a lot of requests to play 'Heigh Ho, Heigh Ho, It's to the Games We Go', by the Seven Scum, but I'm not going to because I'm sick of it."
Jonathan Sunshine, XHaDO Radio Morning DJ

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Select Leading Edge Games -'Famous Last Words'

"Never give an inch! I will never surrender! I shall fight unt...."
Last words of more than one Glory character

Scratch, scratch. "I can just barely make it out, it's in Russian. It says, 'This face towards enem....'"
Din the Decisive, his last words

"I knew that someday, somehow, we'd both die. I just figured you'd be first."
Gerfel, his last words. Wrong, as usual.

"Why are you ducking? He couldn't possibly hit us in the head from there."
Humbert NoDose, his last words

"Look! The bleeding stopped! Uh oh."
Ictentrid the Noseless, His Last Words

"I thought you brought the antidote!"
Spewer G'nu, Drop Infantryman (his last words)

"Nobody would make a trap this elaborate unless there was something important here. Bury them later, we must go on!"
Darantz

"Oh look, the Cockatrice is doing tricks! He must be tame. I wish we had some food we could give him. Gosh, he's just walking right up to us..."
Tweets Madison, Last words

"Dead is Dead"
Butcher Barnes' epitaph

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Saeder-Krupp Dragoons

"It won't do you any good to kill me. I always come back"
Hans Brackhaus, envoy to Lofwyr

"You can never have too much armor."
Trebor Nawoc

"A good sword is the soul of a warrior. It is also 499 silver pieces retail."
Stuart Tank

"If you hit them hard enough, they can't complain."
Field Marshal Paul Maul

"That looks pretty fatal-I think you'll have to return to the character generation section."
One character to another

"Hold! I've been struck from behind."
Angus the Obese

"The Edge, the Edge, not the Flat!"
The Instructor, Saeder-Krupp Weaponmaster

"We are in the right, you know."
Sindred

"You have fought well, Sir, and I accept your surrender. Uh, could you stop bleeding on my armor? Do you know how expensive this is?"
McDraco

• "Fools! None shall oppose me and live!"
  
• "Now you die!"
  
• "You'll never escape me now!"
  Excerpts, Path of Power, a standard S-K dialogue manual

"It's terrible! Look how many men you've lost! How many more will you send to their doom?"
Vladimir the Just
      "As many as it takes."
      Field Marshal Paul Maul

Thump...Clatter...Thud. "Next!"
Gregor negotiating with the orc envoy

"Those people have no respect for human life."
An innocent bystander

"Not another midnight raid. I'm getting too old for this."
Fredor, Lord of the Inner Sea

What do you seek most in life, my son?
"Experience!"
A Character

"My recurring nightmare is being 5th level and trapped in a world of firsts."
Louie, the One-Armed Wonder

"Boil him until he cracks."
Excerpt, The Egg's Interrogation Manual

"Another round of shakes and fries for my men!"
Angus the Obese

"How should I have known he wasn't any good? He said he was equally skilled with all weapons."
Louis Anvil

"I can't take it! I give up! We're doomed! We're all going to die!"
Gerfel of Argh

"Hey Gerfel, wake up, can you here me? You're dying."
Trebor Nawoc

"Will I have to remember any of this?"
Phoenix, man at arms, Auxiliary Line
      "No, where you're going, it won't matter."
      Silver Targa Xenese, Mission Briefing

"No point in a rescue attempt. He was carried away by Birdmen--20 pounds at a time."
Derek

"That thing is worse than a food processor. It slices. It dices. It turned Julienne into fries!"
Trebor Nawoc

"We are still in the right, you know."
Sindred

"Being decimated isn't so bad. It's only ten percent casualties."
Sindred
      "If that's the case, decimate them ten-fold."
      King Phillip the Heavy Handed

"Well, you can just die then."
End of many negotiations

"The pen may be mightier than the sword, but I fear the sword more."
Fredor, Lord of the Inner Sea

"Duck and dodge, weave and OUCH!"
Sidevelix Janel, Squad Leader, Vanguard Line

"Shish-ke-bob!"
Battle cry of Lahca, Mobile Line Lancer

"Good catch, sirrah!"
Tyrus Rex, master of Shaken, the Flying Death

"Chivalry is dead, and so are you!"
Larz the Magician, Generally Considered A Not-Nice Person

"You can't fool me, it's all done with mirrors."
Tarmac

"I see a storm coming. Uh, why don't you be the standard bearer?"
Trebor Nawoc to his aide

"Eat Flaming Death!"
Huzzah the Magnificent

Extended Death Spell

Type: Mana	Range: Unlimited	Target: Willpower (R)
Damage Level: DDD	Duration: Instant	Drain: [(Fx2)+5]D

"As regular Death Spell, but also affects target's family, relatives, friends, business associates, acquaintances, and strangers who bear a faint physical resemblance. Especially effective against tight-knit clans, but not as good as the Genocide Spell."
Surviving scrap from Marak's Encyclopedia Magicus recovered from the Crypt of Iso

"Let's plant him and see what grows!"
Kneedeepdulac Demonicus, Chief Jailer of Zungel

"How was I to know you can't parallel park a sailing ship?"
The Boss

"I think I hear someone coming. Try to bleed more quietly."
Seth, Squad Leader, Primary Line

"I wouldn't call it storming the walls when we're only using one ladder."
Draclod

"They seem to have recycled their plowshares."
Trebor Nawoc

"Right then! No more goodness and niceness!"
Darantz

"Don't worry about a thing. Just tuck behind that shield and charge. We'll be right behind you."
Trebor

"Say, that looks pretty sharp. I don't suppose we could just arm wrestle over this?"
Alferd

"What do you mean the worst he could do is kill a few of us up front?"
Gerfel

"Now, remember, you guys in the front. If you feel like you're dying, try to fall on their spears as you go down."
Agrat

"How come, just because I have a shield, I always have to be in the front?"
Alferd

"We'll start by trying to get some allies. If that doesn't work, we'll sabotage everything in sight. And if they still don't give us what we want, then we're back to booting head."
The Death Clowns

"The first lesson in war, my son, is that you can only parry a sword blow with your hand once."
Louie the One-Armed Wonder

"It is usually better to be stuck through than cut through. On the other hand, being mashed flat isn't so bad."
Death Bunny

"Oh, great, Dirk. One little stab in the intestines and you go down."
Terras

"Look Dirk, if you're going to bleed, bleed on the enemy."
Horatio

"Well, Dirk, if you're going to die, could you at least die in a strategically useful position?"
Norman Steele

"Die! Die! Die!"
Megaray

• "That's Unreasonable!"
• "That's Disgusting!"
• "Frankly, I'm shocked and appalled."
  Horatio

"Have we found Louis?"
Blackjack
      "Well, most of him."
      Mojo Whiteleg

---

Merc Mirth

"A soldier's life may seem glamorous: mindless violence, endless drill, years of war and gut-wrenching hardship...but there's a lot more to it than that."
Sgt. Ingram

• "What we need in this town is more Law and Order."
  
• "What we need in this town is more gallows."
  
• "Well, I guess what we really need in this town is a bigger cemetery."
  Mayor Winterbotham

"What could be a better world? We have food, free time...and total anarchy."
Crestus Throle

"Of course I joined the outlaws. They have the coolest outfits."
Tex

"Hey kid, you're too young to use a Chainsaw. How about a nice blender or something?"
Sergeant Servo

"I've never shot a man who wasn't at the end of my bayonet."
Bayonet Pete, a man largely unclear on small arms tactics

"...and if the bayonet becomes stuck, you can always free the weapon by firing it."
Field Marshall Paul Maul's Tactical Manual

"How do you expect me to fight with this helmet on? And this ammo weighs a ton!"
Humbert NoDose

"If you can't dazzle them with style, riddle them with bullets"
"...And if you can't riddle them with bullets, fry them like an egg."
Corely Norris

"I would, but my ankle hurts."
Humbert NoDose

"This war will not end until there is Just Us!"
Ictentrid O'Reilly

"It is better to have fought and died, than never to have fought at all... well maybe not."
Din the Decisive

"Don't think of it as being vastly outnumbered, think of it as having a very wide shot selection."
Generalissimo Puerco, President for Life

"Is it supposed to smoke like this?"
Trebor Nawoc

"Grenade? Where?"
Bruce the Blind

"For a lasting victory, we must bury their hearts and minds."
Paul Maul

"Join the Army...where everyday could be your last!"
Sgt. Ingram

"Listen, when I want your opinion, I'll tell you what it is."
Sgt. Ingram

"I think I'm allergic to war."
Din the Decisive

"By sundown? I'm sorry, I just don't see how I can do it. I have my oil to change, laundry to pick up, packing still to do....How about if I get out of town by, say, Thursday evening, Friday morning at the latest?"
Killer Keith MacMyer

"Once you've pulled the pin out of Mr. Grenade, he is no longer your friend."
Sgt. Servo

• "Who died and made you Lieutenant?"
  
• "Listen, Lieutenant; No food, No fight."
  
• "Look Lieutenant, we either do it my way or I'll have to shoot you."
  Sgt. Servo

"Well, at least I have a hobby."
Pete the Pyromaniac

"Well, you can either surrender...or you can become a human hibachi."
The Torch Patrol

"Violence is Golden."
Corely Norris

Crunch. Snap. Rattle.
"The only surprise in this attack is that they haven't opened fire on us yet."
Draclod McDraco, Commando Extraordinaire

"Ma, when I said I wanted a new Cap and Ball, I meant a gun!"
Mean Marc MacMyer

"Well, perhaps you shouldn't have believed him when he told you his gun was empty.
He's the ENEMY."
Lt. Derek

"Sarge, I've gotten both of my arms disabled again. What are the rules for Primary and Off-Foot shooting?"
Private Lefty

"I don't think they'll come out of their bunker...even if we ask them nicely."
Private Humbert

"Have you finished cleaning Gerfel off the tank yet?"
Draclod McDraco, Tank Commander Extraordinaire

"No retreat, no surrender...most of the time."
Din the Decisive

"Boyar hasn't returned from patrol, sir. He's still bouncing around the minefield."
Corporal Nawoc

"The richer you are, the cheaper life becomes."
Norman Steele

"You only think you're winning because you have more guns and more ammunition.
We have more casualties."
Humbert No-Dose

"I'll distract him with idle conversation. You blow him up."
Lindsey

"Don't put off until tomorrow what you can demolish today."
Corley Norris

"He sent his sympathies...postage due."
O. Man

"Well, you missed the enemy, but that tree will never be the same."
Derek

"I don't think any of us will ever forget Louie. Ever since the explosion there's a little piece of him on all of us."
Trebor Nawoc

"One more word out of you, and you'll be our next adjustment shot."
Field Marshal Paul Maul

"There's a surprise out there with your name on it. Your name is Claymore, isn't it?"
Sgt. Ingram

"Look on the bright side. Dying is the next best thing to living."
Sgt. Strict

"Sorry, Captain, but it sure didn't look like a friendly aircraft from here."
Schnurda

"Fine, shoot off my other leg. See if I care."
Ridan

"Don't make me blow you up."
Kyle the Walking Claymore

"If all of your friends threw themselves on grenades, would you do it too?"
Sgt. Servo

"Well, if Tex has four Aces, Ralph has four Aces, and I have four Aces, I figure that one of us is probably cheating."
Gus

"Alright, I want a clean fight. No hitting below the belt. Begin."
BLAM!
"Hmm. Well, that's not quite what I had in mind, but nice shot.
It appeared we have a new heavyweight champion."
B. Toast

"Of course they're loyal to me. I have the best troops money can buy."
Corely Norris

"Look, I went off duty 10 minutes ago. You shoot him."
Officer Eric

"I do not consider you expendable. You are just easily replaced."
Captain Austin Blackwell

"Shape up or get shot."
Captain Austin Blackwell

"There is no such thing as Overkill."
Corely Norris

"Never admit defeat. Just blame it on someone else."
Sgt. Servo

"It's true that I don't like you. But being ordered to kill you is just a happy coincidence."
Sgt. Servo

"Wait a minute. This smacks of Morality and Democracy."
Hurlo Squidicus

"How do you expect me to hit anything when they all keep moving?"
Humbert No-Dose

"He was wrong, so I shot him. Where's the harm in that?"
Hamilcar

"No one ever won a war by spending his economy into bankruptcy. He won the war by making the other poor dumb guy spend his economy into bankruptcy."
Marshall Paul "Blood 'n Bucks" Maul

"Yes, we have a high Kill Ratio. I only wish it was in our favor."
Gerfel

"There is a time and a place for everything, except peace."
Corely Norris

"If you don't shoot me, I'll be your best friend."
S. Silver

"This whole 'fair fight' thing is nice in theory, but if we actually implement it, we could get hurt."
Humbert

"There's a place in this war for everyone. Your's just happens to be six feet under."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"You want to try to hit many people with one bullet each, not one person with all of your bullets."
Lt. Derek

"If the attack works, we're all heroes. If not, we'll get a group discount at the cemetary."
Draclod McDraco

"I'd like to think I was being shot by a better class of person."
Trebor Nawac

"Targets can't be choosers."
Corely Norris

"If God hadn't meant them to be stepped on he wouldn't have given me feet."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"People - you can't live with them, you can't kill enough of them to make a difference."
Norman Steele

"People - you can't live with them, you can't hit them in the head with a ten pound rock."
Trebor

"You'll know when I'm talking to you, because my gun will be pointing at you."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"You'd know if I thought it was your fault because you'd be dead."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"I've made my decision and I'm standing by it... if that's OK with everyone else."
Private Humbert

"They're shooting back. This is not my idea of a fair fight."
Ridan

"Well, Major, I don't think it would be fair to you as a person for me to respect you until I get to know you better."
Sgt. Servo

"I knew I'd get shot at when I enlisted. I just didn't think I'd get hit."
Gerfel

"I'm not interested in making new friends. I don't even like the ones I have."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"Is that an order, sir, or are you just being rude?"
Sgt. Servo

"You may have superior weaponry, but you're also out of ammo, and I've still got plenty of rocks."
Norman Steele

"He who laughs last gets shot first."
Corely Norris

"If I weren't so badly wounded and you weren't so much bigger than I am, I might take offense to that. "
Din the Decisive

"You can stop being useless now. The crisis has passed."
Derek

"Why would I want more troops? Some of the ones I have here are still alive."
Ictentrid O'Reilly

"At first it really hurt, like somebody had thrown a spear through my head. But it turned out it was just a javelin."
Darantz

---

Starving & Lost in the Salish Lands

"We can stay out here in the wilderness, or we can try to reach civilization. Assuming there's a visible difference."
Gordon Stauffer, Ranger, Day 6

"Death is the only acceptable form of amnesty."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"Smile. Today is the last day of the rest of your life."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"Has everyone gone crazy around here?"
Officer Eric

"Which part of the Forest is edible?"
Rejected Refugee

"All these berries look the same to me. But I'm pretty sure the one's you're eating aren't poisonous."
Another Rejected Refugee

"We're hungry, tired, thirsty, and 200 miles from civilization, and all you brought was dirty clothes?"
Casey, Bondsman Ranger

"Don't worry about that hole in your shoe. We'll die of thirst long before your feet blister."
Norman Steele, Bondsman Ranger

"So, where is the outlet for my blow-dryer?"
Seretech Refugee, confused about the nature of the Salish.

"Hey, he got more grubs than I did."
Rejected Refugee
      "Shut up and keep digging."
      Another Rejected Refugee

"Look! An oasis of urban civility."
Sgt. Ingram

"There is such a thing as having too much bran in your diet."
Rejected Refugee

"While you're planning the Great Food Store Robbery, bear in mind that our only getaway vehicle is a bulldozer."
Mean Marc MacMyer to the rest of the MacMyer Gang, Day 49

"Hey, there was nothing in the brochure about being eaten alive. What kind of wilderness is this?"
Brewster MacAlpine, Day 11

"Frankly, I liked being a fat, happy Bondsman."
Big Dirk, Bondsmen Community Diasyocho

"That wound looks really serious. But look on the bright side; you probably have a few more hours before you die."
Crestus Throle, Bondsmen Community Quatro

"I once read a book that had a picture of a tree on the cover. So yes, I do consider myself an expert in foraging."
Morris Angstrom, Rejected Refugee

"What-maggots for dinner again?"
Rejected Refugee

"If I didn't know better, I'd say we've just been exiled."
Tazuya the Mook, Bondsmen Community Trece, Day 16

"It isn't cannibalism if they don't know what they're eating."
Chef Yomo D'Arco, Kiwan Catering

"Who cares about the things that go 'bump' in the night? It's the ones that go 'chomp' that worry me."
Fargus Liverwort, Asha Tatum Products

"You are now free men. Free to swear fealty to Me."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"Explain again how feeding people to the Basilisk and then eating the Basilisk is a closed ecosystem."
Lars Swedenborg, Bondsmen Community Diasysiete

"Oh, yeah, we're free all right. Free to starve. Free to freeze. Free to die! Why did I ever listen to you anyway?!"
Big Dirk, Bondsmen Community Diasyocho

"How do you want this guy cooked? Rare, medium rare...?"
Slozek making small talk over the campfire, Day 6

"It looked like we were all going to freeze to death, but then we voted one guy 'Most Flammable Refugee'."
Clement Uxmal

"We're surviving like everyone else: a little roughage, a little fruit, a little cannibalism."
Clement Uxmal

"I hope you won't take this the wrong way, but do you have any last words?"
Hammerin' Heather MacMyer to a distant cousin during the Great Attempted Food Store Robbery, Day 55

"The good news is you're not dead. The bad news is you're still burning."
Killer Keith MacMyer to another distant cousin during the Great Attempted Food Store Robbery, Day 55

"You just have some respect for your parents, young man. If it weren't for us, you wouldn't be here starving to death right now."
Mad Ma MacMyer to one of her ungrateful sons, Day 64

"I think I just got a '****' injury."
Mojo Whiteleg

"I'm a little disappointed. I thought trolling with human meat would be much more effective. Tell you what, let's try it with live ones tomorrow, and see how that goes."
Mic Mikillin, Ex-Financier, and the current Captain of "The League of the Ocher Ogres"

"The Sony Battletach: it's not just for Wilderness Survival anymore."
Esteban Teller

"Look-I've paid a lot of good money to get where I am today."
Seretech Refugee

"They just had all of their personal possessions and several family members blown up. I don't think we'll have much trouble exiling them."
Mahout Kantong, Head of Security, Seretech Corp

"I'd feel better about the new Lieutenant if he weren't still reading the Owner's Manual for his mess kit."
Sgt. Ingram

"He deserved to die. He wouldn't share his brownies with me."
Alvin Boyarski, Former Security Officer, Day 31

"Well, sir, frankly, you talk too much. But I have a solution."
Bang.
"Cool, I've always wanted to do that."
Crazy Stan, The Azzie Man; ex-Sergeant, Battalion Reserves, Day 64

"Fortunately, I am far too exhausted to care about how hungry I am."
Big Dirk, Bondsmen Community Diasyocho

"You wouldn't last a week if I died"
Mathew Shamus III, soon-to-be-Ex-guide
      "Maybe, Let's find out, shall we?"
      Corely Norris, Hackley Merson, Inc., Day 20

"Look, if I weren't starving to death, I'm sure that I'd care that your feet are cold."
Killer Keith MacMyer, Day 63

"You can leave in an orderly fashion. Or, I can shoot you."
Found spraypainted in 6-foot letters on a large abandoned factory wall in Bondsmen Community Diasysiete

"You just bought a one-way ticket, six feet straight down."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell, Bondsmen Community Treseynueve

"I see you've found another of the obstacles on Mr. Beak's Survival Challenge. Looks painful."
Delon Schnick, Ex-Ranger and Guide, Mr. Beak's Survival Challenge: Isla Nublar

"Think of them as future sausages. Because they are going to die like pigs."
Winston Blakemore, Aztechnology, Day 47

"Spite is a wonderful Motivator."
Delon Schnick, Ex-Ranger and Guide, Mr. Beak's Survival Challenge: Isla Nublar, Day 1

"No, you can't fill your Aux Pack with junk food."
Derek

"No, you won't need a sleeping bag, it's not that kind of Backpack."
Derek

"I wouldn't mind getting mauled by wild animals so often if it didn't hurt so much."
Bwana Dick

"You've got the safari hat, so you'll be our animal expert."
Gordon Stauffer, Ranger

"Remember, all you folks out there in the wilderness...
If you swallow your pride, you can swallow more food."
Brandy Charlatan, Station Manger, XHaDO Radio

---

Desert War is Heck!

"Seeing as I'm right, and you disagree, you must be wrong."
Sgt. Ingram

"Don't worry. By the time we get there, I'll have figured it out."
Sgt. Ingram

"I have more fun dying than most people have living."
Dawn Petrol

"We've got you surrounded, so you better give up...Okay?"
S. Silver

"Inconsistency is the key to flexibility."
Lord Barons

"Megalomania is it's own reward."
Lord Barons

"Don't worry. If I get shot in the heart, I'll just requisition another one."
Ridan, Ares Corp

"We don't mind you stationing your troops here, It's just that if they all defect at once, it will cause a serious problem for Immigration."
A concerned Desert Wars official responding to the movement of part of the CAS Olde Home Guard

"Talk is cheap. Guns cost money."
Stuart Tank

"I've spent so much time in front of a gun camera that I've got a permanent smile stuck on my face."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"The Guard dies, but never surrenders."
Colonel Cambronne, CAS Olde Home Guard

"Have you had your Meperidine today?"
Scarhead Tom, Fuchi

"Kill a Scout in anger, and a hundred lives are lost."
Jason, desperately trying to establish his own net worth to an enraged Capt. Blackwell

Grind. Rattle. Clunk.
"Give me my gun and I'll put it out of its misery."
Sandy Jorden, Senior Technician

"If it breaks, it needed replacing."
Trebor Nawoc

"Is there a Dragon around I can talk to?"
Andy Brennan, Operations Officer S-K

"What good is my life, if I do not use it to defend what I believe in?"
Palin, Shiawase Corp, before being voulenteered for recalcitrant guard duty

"Of course we like him best, we met him first."
D.T.

"Good Morning, Lieutenant. Come on down, the weather's fine."
Trent

"I'd love to stay, but power's low and I'm late for a hot shower."
Lance

"Suicide or Death...It's your choice!"
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"Yes, they were unruly, undisciplined, and nearly impossible to deal with. But when I had a rough job that needed doing, there were none more eager."
Flynn, Saeder-Krupp

"Just to refresh my memory, would you remind me why I'm trying to kill you?"
Bustem Heds

"Carrying a gun in town is like painting a bullseye on your back."
Arris Boylen, Hard Corps Team Member

Dress to Oppress
by Manuel Puerco, a BEST training manual

"Another day, another body count."
Mister Beasle

"To kill is a thrill, but slaughter is hotter."
The Digging Crew

"Conserve Ammo! Slay 'em, don't Spray 'em!"
Corely Norris

"Most People live such sad lives, wishing they could do what they want. I don't have that problem: there's nothing I want to do."
Crestus Throle

"You can afford to call it a 'Wasp Relic'. You're not the one who got blown up."
Captain Gran Boston, discussing the Northrup Wasp with his superiors.

"I'm going to hunt us down an APC. Get the Elephant Gun."
Captain Art Safri

"Your money can talk all it wants; my gun will make the decisions."
Victor Garantz, Renraku Security

"The field test of the WM-2 Mantis was a functional success with anomalous post-encounter conditions."
Executive Scientist Edmund Fowler, Director of S-K Robotics Service

"Fighting Power Armor is bad enough. Now we're supposed to fight Power Armor with Tails?"
Captain Hugh Wilton, Commanding Officer, "E" Company, Ares Macrotech during the Destruction of their Command Post at the hands of Saeder-Krupp

"Just do as you're told. You aren't being paid to think."
Osric Tuber, Director of Research

"What do you think this is... a democracy?"
Tiber Barnett, Chairman, Aztechnology Auditing Committee

"This unholy alliance of Human traitors with the most belligerent of alien races will be met, matched, and defeated by the united powers of the UCAS."
Official Response to Chicago's request for assistance against the Insect Spritis/Horrors Invasion
      "Save who you can."
      Confidential message from the FDC to Chicago's Mayor's Office, shortly after the Spectral Invasion

"More Metroplex Guardsmen are coming to Seattle? Gosh, why don't I feel safer?"
Officer Eric

"I think the Displacer effect has gone to your head."
Earl Keef, Launch Emergency Team Alpha

"We must not tarnish the good name of this organization by delving into the forbidden technologies, unless is a matter of life or death... or it will give us a small political advantage."
Gordon Alder, Renraku Legal Consultant

"Sure you get a great view from 30 feet up. But you give your opponents and even better one."
Davis Steinman, Jet-Pax Review Committee

"The YellowJacket and the Beachcraft have one thing in common: neither is technologically advanced."
Colonel Broadmore, Commander, Ares Forces, Desert Wars XII

"Kiss your big robot goodbye."
Niki

"Hey, it's not my job. You figure it out."
Fowler's most useful advice to Ziers

"Well, 14 out of 92 ain't bad. Hey, wait a minute, that's terrible!"
Mechanical Research Technologies analyst reviewing the battle reports

"What do you mean, 'it's my job'? This was strictly a career move."
Ziers' response to Fowler

"We found Boyar - he was under the Beachcraft."
Derek

"As your leader, let me assure you that none of this was my fault."
Fowler

"Well, you know what they say: 'Ziers Today, Gone Tomorrow'."
Stania Borodin

"How much talent does it take to just stand there and get shot?"
Davis Steinman

"Great. Robots on Steroids."
Niki

"My robot's bigger than your robot."
Weismyer
      "It'll just make a bigger divot when it falls over."
      Prescott

"Let's go violate some civil rights."
Agent Kasha Briceton

"The Aztechnology Secret Service. If you can't trust us, who can you trust?"
Public relations campaign for the ASS

"Those medals aren't for valor. They're for violence."
Briceton

"People die every day. Today just happens to be your day."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"Sure, it will probably explode. But at least I won't be in it, on it, or near it."
Beachcraft Technician relieved to be reassigned to Atlanta

"70 tons of junk. 70 tons of molten slag. 70 tons of useless scrap."
Niki's opinion of giant robots

"Let them eat Lead."
Machine-gun Antoinette, Fuchi Security

"No excuses are acceptable."
Standard ASS Policy

"When in doubt, use a grenade."
Trebor Nawoc

"I'd like to see the look on Prescott's face now."
Briceton, as she blows up the Command Center

"If you contact the Ops Team, tell them Darantz wants his flashlight back."
Sol to HQ

"Yes, we are taking full advantage of the misfortune of others. What's your point?"
Simon DeBoer, Chief Executive Officer, Scan Medical Technologies, Inc.

"You're out of ammo? Then I guess you're our point man."
Crazy Stan, The Azzie Man; ex-Sergeant, Battalion Reserves, Day 64

"Bombings, firestorms, lootings... it's been a busy day."
Hosef Pharra, Chief Executive Officer, BrutalVision, Inc.

"Somebody has to take responsibility eventually... don't they?"
Eve Malcom, Seretech Fuels

"There are 15,000 barbarians at the gate. Quick, turn out the lights; we'll pretend we aren't home."
Grant Tank, Head of Security, Osiris Corp

"No, I won't accept their surrender. There's still money to be made on this war."
Murry, Jupiter Fields Group

"I've got a Tombstone here with your name on it."
Corely Norris, Hackley Merson, Inc, Day 31

"Highly toxic chemicals, bombing from space, and biological warfare? Not exactly my dream home, but the price is right. I'll take it!"
Casta Jandara, New Homeowner, Paragon Industries, Day 2

"If you want a city looted properly, you have to do it yourself."
Hosef Pharra, Chief Executive Officer, BrutalVision, Day 12

"If you can't get results by violence, you aren't being violent enough."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell, Bondsmen Community 39

"If I'd known the Gang jackets looked like this, I'd have stayed a refugee."
Roger Weffner, New Member of the Crimson Weasel Gang

"It wasn't honorable in the least, but it was effective."
Senator P. B. Judik, Saeder-Krupp Appropriations Committee

"Improving the efficiency of our equipment is good. But a Buddy Body Bag is going to far."
Senator P. B. Judik, Saeder-Krupp Appropriations Committee

"Isn't it enough that the Dragoons are in armor? Do they have to have weapons too?"
Sgt. Servo

"Can I get corrective lenses in my Bifocal Unit?"
Bruce

"No, there isn't any place to put the film. It's not that kind of Gun Camera."
Sgt. Wily Bob McDraco

"What do you think? Is this one Bonnie or is it Clyde"
Alexander Century

"I'm not worried about artificial intelligence. It's the artificial humanity that bothers me."
Niki

"Of course I appreciate Saeder-Krupp making my Power Armor. But, I'd appreciate it even more if it didn't have a tail.."
Marduk

"That's it, no more junk food. It's not as easy as letting out a few notches in a belt, you know."
Sandy Jorden, Senior Technician - Powered Armor Division

"I say we hit the Self Destruct and start fresh in the morning."
Overworked Starguild Technician

"I don't want to see you. I don't even want to see you dead."
Captain Austin D. Blackwell

"I make all my own decisions, as long as everyone else agrees."
Big Dirk

---

Urbane Brawl -- NOT!!

"Fall back, medic. If I die, I die. If you die, the whole Team dies."
Niki

"Everyone shoot the man on the left."
Traditional Urban Brawl battle tactic

"We had to shoot him. He wasn't a Team Player."
The Death Clowns

"Load the bang sticks and pack up the tree shredder-We've got a job to do."
Officer Eric, ISSV Rules Enforcement

"This isn't a jury of my peers...They're all common citizens!"
Ex-Captain Tyrell, Atlanta Butchers UBT