A recent discussion between contributors here debated the use of the word "schmuck" in our publication. This led to some looking into the origin of a number of Yiddish words, many of which have interesting histories, and more than a few amusing anecdotes.
Some choice Jewish words were mentioned used to describe certain obnoxious individuals. "Shlemiel" and "shmuck" are examples of such words. They are offensive to those receiving such words as epithets.
The word "shmuck" has a number of meanings, such as jerk, boob, bumbling idiot, etc. But in fact it refers to the male appendage in the pubic region which all men hold most dear. In every language, some word for that male organ has been enlisted in the service of a "scornful insult".
In looking into the origin of this word, we came upon an amusing story of a schmuck and his camel:
Mr Shapiro, sixty-five and a widower, was having a lonely time in Miami Beach. He observed a man of his own age who was never without female companionship, forever surrounding him, extending invitations and regaling him with amorous advances.
One day he worked up the courage to ask this paragon: "Mister, excuse me, what should I do to make friends like yours?". The man sneered and said: "Get a camel. Then ride up an down Collins Avenue every day. Before you know it, everyone in Miami will be asking who that man is, and you will have to hire a social secretary to handle all of the invitations.
So Mr Shapiro purchased a newspaper and looked through the ads. By good fortune he read of a circus, stranded in Miami, in need of capital. Mr S. phoned the circus owner and within the hour he had rented a camel.
The next morning, Mr S. wearing khaki shorts and a pith helmet, set forth on his camel and on to Collins Avenue. Everywhere people stopped, buzzed, gawked and pointed. Every day for a week he rode his trusty steed.
One morning, as he was about to get dressed, the telephone rang. It was the parking lot attendant to tell him that his camel had been stolen. Mr S. called the police. Sergeant O'Riley answered.
"Hey, look at the shmuck on that camel!!"
"What...you say someone stole your camel?"
"That's right", said Mr S.
"I have to fill out a form", said the sargeant,
"How tall is the animal?"
"From the sidewalk to his back, where I sit, a good six feet."
"What color is it?"
"Camel color, a regular camel-colored camel."
"Was it male or female?"
"What?"
"Was the animal male or female?"
"How am I supposed to know that?
Wait a minute. Yes, it was a male."
"Are you sure?"
"Absolutely."
"But a minute ago you said you weren't sure."
"I'm positive, officer, because I just remembered...
Every time and every place I was riding
on that camel, I heard people yelling:
This tale is excerpted from:
The Joys of Yiddish by Leo Rosten.
Pocket Books, Division of Simon and Shuster,
New York, N.Y. 1970.
May 12, 1996 Michael W. Paparella All Rights Reserved
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